The American Overclocked Otaku

I’m a fscking coward.

Among the Christmas presents I’ve gotten, my parents bought me a really nice watch. I normally don’t wear watches, but this one was freakin’ awesome; the trouble was, it needed to be adjusted. So I go to a nearby jewelers and I end up being helped by a woman who’s simply…Beautiful. I turn in my watch to get adjusted and we just start talking. No awkward silence or idle chitchat one would toss towards any other stranger, but we actually had a fscking conversation. >.< I mean…I don’t mean to blow this out of proportion, but for those few minutes we talked a bit about how busy we were during the holidays, how I worked a few stores down at Subway, how Gamestop managed to forget putting a few games in the cases we bought (We got the games for ‘em the day afterwards, in either case. n.n), and how in the hell something like that could happen.

She’s not only gorgeous, but she loves video games. ;-; She’s one of the women that are far and few in-between who both love video games and don’t seem to have something mentally wrong with them.

I’m a coward because I didn’t even ask her out; but really, how can one approach a woman one just met and ask them if she’d like to go out sometime after a conversation? In every job I’ve been in, the women I’ve worked with have been hit on nearly every day. Some customers practically stalk these poor women, and from my perspective it’s always pathetic; I almost feel as sorry for the guy asking the woman out as I feel like laughing at him being the fifth or six guy to do it since I’ve been there. And here I am in the wake of my hypocrisy, wanting to ask an intriguing woman if there’s any way I could see her again while unwilling to make myself into just another man who had been hitting on her that day in her eyes. The only thing that rivals my anger and disgust towards myself for not simply being a fool and asking her out is the keenest sense of loneliness that accompanies it.

Bleh…At least my watch fits me perfectly, now. Thanks Stephanie (The one who isn’t my boss. Or once my employee. Or any other Stephanie that I otherwise know. Srsly. u.u). =)

Yeah, Gamestop pretty much took a big dump on my Christmas.

I say so because on Christmas Day, with all of the pretty lights on the tree and the presents arranged perfectly, two of the games didn’t even have anything in them; no manuels, no games, nothing. Worse, my mom lost the receipt! >.< It was a pretty big disappointment, although my dad, my little sister and I all went to Gamestop and got the games we needed. Apparantly, it was easy to tell because we had the ‘display cases’…So he didn’t need any receipt. Or any proof, really.

I was so on the verge of spilling all the good stuff on the games I got…But I’m tired and, therefore, grumpy. Expect a synopsis tomorrow. =)

My grandma’s staying the night, and I’m pretty much stuffed. Considering how it’s the night before the climax of all this waiting around for stuff, it isn’t too surprising that I’m mentally awake despite how my body’s in need of sleep. I’m excited, really; it turns out that there are some things I know I’m getting, and a few more things that leave me baffled. When it comes to Christmas, it isn’t just about getting stuff for free or even having an ample opportunity to get something for those you care about without much explaining. And despite the theological date in reference to Christianity, it isn’t even about the death of Christ- at least, it isn’t for me. For me, Christmas is about family and loved ones and touching them in the metaphorical sense. And while one might point out how money is the root of all evil and that presents paired with St. Nick don’t make Christmas, or that Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus…Honestly? If someone not only put thought, time and effort into getting me a present, but also made it a surprise? It’d really…Touch me (for a lack of a better, non-metaphorical term) in a way that I’d really want to share. From my family to those I really care about in some degree or another, that surprise mingled with such deep sincerity’s something I can’t help but want to give to others.

I can honestly say without stupid altruism or bitch-like ass-kissing that despite how annoying they can be, anyone would be hard-pressed to match the love I have for my family. From my annoying little sister, to my pervert of a father, to my frustrating mother and hard-headed grandmother, sometimes I wonder why they put up with a guy like me. I’m lazy, procrastinating, and disrespectful and damn-near arrogant at times, even when I don’t mean to be. I really don’t have much in the way of friends, and the friends that I do have I never keep in contact with. And if it wasn’t for those mentioned before, my aunt, uncle and cousins I could say with complete confidence that my life would be much emptier, much lonelier then I think I could stand. Days like this remind me that whether or not they bought me presents doesn’t matter, so much as the simple fact that they did think of me when they bought them. And as much as I bitch about my little sister being the “Golden Child” (And as much animosity I feel when I think I’m getting the short end of the stick in comparison to her), I don’t know what I would do without any of them to help me through this hectic world.

I’m normally not the sort who bares his emotions, especially not on some blog. More often then not I express my frustrations through an irate rant or a smartass point of view; one could blame this on both my lack of social life and complete lack of affection. I haven’t had a girlfriend in years because I don’t want to be with anyone I couldn’t relate to or who repulses me, and my family’s the only people in the world who’ve been worried. I couldn’t tell you how many times in how many ways I’ve disappointed them in one way or the other, mostly because there’ve been times when I have and they’ve bitten their bottom lips (That’s a SMIB Expression…’Southern Maryland In-Bred’. Get it? =3). I just hope that after College, after I get my life together and kick my ass into gear that they’ll be proud of me.

Meh…What an emo post; but I’m not sad, so much as I’m happy to be with the people I really care about this Christmas. All I need now is an intriguing, adorable girlfriend and plenty of affection to make up for lost time. ~.^ Maybe one of these days…

Jack-in-the-Box (Source: www.Wikipedia.com): A jack-in-the-box is a children’s toy that outwardly consists of a box with a crank. When the crank is turned, it plays out a melody, often Pop Goes the Weasel. At the end of the tune, the lid pops open and a figure of some sort, usually a clown, pops out of the box.

A Dump-in-the-Box is pretty much my unimaginitive phrase for saying something is shitty. Where a jack-in-the-box has a song and some tension involved, a dump-in-the-box is exactly that: a steaming pile of crap in a box. Probably cardboard. For example, the fact that even if I go to sleep -now- I’ll get less than eight hours before I have to go to work again? That’s a dump-in-the-box. The fact that I have no social life? Another dump-in-a-box. That after my sleepless work tomorrow I’ll have to watch the Redskins lose to the Eagles again, and then trudge off to be the back of my family by helping cart giant logs and split them for firewood next year because my dad’s OCD over having an almost-excessive amount of wood- to the point of irking me?

Oh, yeah. Massive dump-in-the-box.

The good news is that I get paid, tomorrow. Considering Christmas is in a scant two weeks and most of my presents have already been bought and given, I should be able to save the Moolah- despite my dorky hobbies. Woo. =D

And then just touch me.
Until I get my
Satisfaction. <.<;

Well, it seems that once more my friday is shat upon by my work. I ask for one evening off a week, and am willing to work all others; but of all days, I need to work this evening. To add insult to injury, it’s from 5pm - 8pm…Aardvark’s starts at 6. =(

Okay, so it’s very unlikely that my manager purposely did this (Actually, she’s really nice. n.n As stated a half-dozen times before), but it just irks me how I need to work a mere 3 hours on the only day when I can really play competitively in Magic teh Gathering (Aside from online; but let’s face it, real-life kicks online’s ass anyday). I don’t have much of a life, damn it, and it’d be nice if I can keep what’s left of it that I can, when I can. > = (

This sort of thing’s happened a lot, before. Normally it wouldn’t bother me as much as it does now, but last Friday (Which I was able to attend and nailed 2nd Place. =D Go me.) the owner of Aardvarks told me that the line-up for Aardvark’s was changing slightly. Apparantly- and I’ve noticed this, too- it feels almost intimidating for new players to get into the format via drafts or paid t2 tournies. And, really, he’s right; I haven’t been playing anyone new for quite some time. So, there will be free t2 tournaments with prizes n’ all every Friday, with a Draft once a month. I’m a little wary of this, but according to Mike (The owner) the other stores have tried it out and found an increased interest of new players in the game.

What kinda incensed me is when he asked me to teach the newer players who would participate in the game when I could, every Friday. And, well, to be honest it’d be something I’d enjoy very much. Granted, I tend to geek out when I see someone do something I would never have done (Or worse, not do something I’d have definately done)…But, well, if I can keep that under wraps I think I’d enjoy it very much. Either way, unless I get let out a bit earlier- which is unlikely- there’s very little chance I’ll be able to attend.

Meh…Maybe next week.